Back 2 work

Engine on, ready, get set go...poot poot...y on earth is this engine running so slow..hmmm!

Tats how i feel when I went backto work. I only worked for 2 days, n off on Good Friday, until Easter Monday. Tuesday, drive to KK for induction course for 3 days, then mc on friday, go back kch for further check up.

I only work for 2days in 2 weeks! No wonder the engine is still damn slow.

But my weeks r full of emotional issue. I can apply ointment on the wound that can be seen, but how bout emotional wound? I hate to go through this again n again. I'm working d and I can't bare to face this emotional situation. It will shows in my work performance.

Insecurities r poisonous. They kill u from within without u realizing it. Leaving u like a zombie. Living ur life emotionless, aimless...I x wana go tru dis again. I pray to God for strength n love.

I see the doc, she told something that concern me. I lost my right, n I x wana lost my left 2. I would rather die, 2 b honest. I wish i cud quickly zoom through this hard moment. it's like going through the lowest part of the wheel of life. I wana quickly roll back to the top. I wana b happy again. I wana b strong again. That's all i'm asking for, strength, to find the happiness, n to develop the love I have.

Loving someone so much but not getting the love in return is like Jesus loving us but we nailed Him on the cross. I wish and pray to have that little strength that He has for me to go through this.

She look into the mirror,

wondering what she did wrong,

that she deserved all this.

That eyes staring with sorrowfulness,

begging for some love.

She may be laughing

and smiling,

but only she knew

how painful her heart is.

She hide her pain,

she tried to,

but it's not easy,

cos she's losing the strength,

to fight.

~ex fighter~

Yes..some stone might hit me, but Jesus is doing His best to protect me.